Human interactions at their most fascinating:

Watching the Bachelor franchise is always fun, because it provides an endless stream of fascinating human interactions.

Last night, Katie’s Bachelorette journey came to a close with an engagement to Blake. I wasn’t sure what to think of this ending because the circumstances leading up to it were so bizarre.

Shortly before the end of the show, Greg — who had been Katie’s first choice all along — decided to give Katie an unfair ultimatum. He was on the Bachelorette show so he had to know the rules, but he started demanding that Katie break the rules for him and make it clear that he was her final choice, well before the last rose ceremony.

Katie recognized that this was an unreasonable request, which was why she didn’t give in to it. On the other hand, she did everything but tell Greg that he was “the one” in a desperate attempt to get him to stay, but even so, he wouldn’t have it. If he couldn’t get the guarantee he wanted, he was out of there.

Katie was left so devastated by Greg’s shocking confrontation and departure that she was on the verge of giving up and leaving for good. Then she decided to stay and within the course of one date with Blake, she had decided that actually, he was her person.

Ironically, she then broke her promise to herself of not saying “I love you” until the very end of the show, declaring her love for Blake. She then sent Justin home before their fantasy suite date and sealed the deal with Blake. What a whirlwind. I could be unpacking these dynamics for days.

So many questions:

So many questions come to mind. For example, how could Katie keep her promise to herself to avoid saying “I love you” to any of her suitors until the very end, even in the face of Greg leaving, and then break this promise the very next day with Blake?

And, how was it possible that she could flip so quickly from feeling like she was devastated and done and ready to go home to suddenly declaring her love for Blake?

Was she really as over Greg as she insisted? Watching her argument with him on the After the Final Rose show was incredibly uncomfortable and made me strongly doubt it. There was a whole lot of energy there between the two of them. She was so angry at him it makes me think that she still has a lot of feelings for him.

If she was as happy as she says she is with Blake, why would she need to get into a knock-down, drag-out argument with Greg? The argument was going on for so long that finally, the hosts had to wrap it up with the issues still unresolved. Greg was maintaining that he had needed more from Katie and Katie was continuing to accuse him of all sorts of awful things.

Do I think that Greg was gas-lighting her and that he never had feelings for her? Maybe not. What I do think is that he went on the show knowing the rules and then he demanded that Katie break those rules as a way for her to “prove” to him that she loved him. To me, that was simply unfair.

Maybe it’s this unfairness that has got Katie so angry that she still can’t let go. Even so, if I were Blake, I’d feel pretty uncomfortable about the argument he, and millions of Bachelor Nation fans, had to witness.

No-one gets that irate and goes on and on about their grievances if they just don’t care.

Feelings don’t just go away:

On After the Final Rose, Katie stated that when Greg left, so did her feelings for him, but that’s clearly untrue.

First of all, the heat coming off her during their argument is proof that there’s still something there between her and Greg. We all know how close love and hate are to one-other. The intensity of Katie’s hatred for Greg makes me wonder if there isn’t a strong residue of love for him, just under the surface of her animosity.

Secondly, it wouldn’t be humanly possible for Katie to have cared so deeply for Greg and then for her feelings to have just disappeared in an instant. She would have needed a good amount of time to process the experience; to grieve her losses, and then emotionally let go of her number-one love object.

And that’s one of the biggest problems with the franchise. There is never enough time for people to deal with their normal human emotions in a normal human way.

They’re expected to open their hearts and fall in love in the blink of an eye; they’re asked to be vulnerable in a heartbeat and risk heartbreak and then just as quickly, get over their losses and move on to the next person. It’s enough to make your head spin.

No wonder Katie has residual feelings toward Greg. She hasn’t had the time or space to process any aspect of her loss. Presumably, she’s been spending most of her time with Blake, growing their relationship, which means that she never got a chance to deal with the crushing disappointments of losing both Michael and Greg within one week.

That’s a lot of unresolved emotion for one little heart to deal with. So, I worry for Blake. As much as he and Katie might care for one another, it’s awfully risky for Katie to enter into an engagement with unresolved feelings for at least one, and maybe two other men.

I hope that Katie does get some time to grieve her losses and to emotionally let go of the other men who she loved so that her heart can be fully open to Blake. I fear that if she is still harbouring any unresolved feelings for Greg (and possibly Michael, as well) it will undermine her ability to be fully present and emotionally available to Blake.

While the Bachelor is great at throwing young, attractive people together and creating situations that are conducive to falling quickly into something that feels a lot like love, the one thing it’s horrendous at is dealing with all the real feelings that arise in the process.

The fight between Katie and Greg is an example of all the unresolved emotions that Katie is carrying. I hope for her sake and for Blake’s that she can deal with this emotional baggage, sooner rather than later. If not, her brand new love affair could be doomed from the start.

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