We all make assumptions. We do it all the time. These assumptions can be about pretty much anyone or anything. It’s so easy to think that we know what’s going on in someone else’s head. It’s no problem for us to imagine that we understand why a person has taken a particular course of action. […]
Lots of people are afraid of “conflict” and make every effort to avoid it. The problem is, they don’t really understand what it is they’re avoiding. People who avoid conflict become extremely uncomfortable at the thought of a disagreement, or of someone getting angry at them. They’d rather placate the person, change the subject or […]
Are you one of those people who are afraid of love? Who fear being mistreated, neglected, rejected? If so, you should know that these fears come from experiences you had in the past, either with your family of origin or with people you were romantically involved with. It’s so easy to project your past experiences […]
There are a few basic errors we all tend to make in our relationships. These errors can cause us unnecessary unhappiness and even jeopardize the relationship we’re in. Here are a few basic relationship errors and how to avoid them: Relationship error #1- Erroneous expectations based on things that happened to us in the past. […]
We make a lot of bad choices in our lives. Sometimes, we make these choices because we don’t care to do better. This type of person isn’t going to do any better, precisely because they don’t care. The rest of us who make choices that are counter-productive or even destructive are doing so because of […]
When a person lives through hurtful experiences, whether they’re childhood trauma, war, natural disasters or forced displacement, they can lose the spark that makes life feel worth living. Too much hurt, too many negative experiences can cause a person to shut down emotionally, so much so that they feel dulled inside. This inner dullness is […]
I find that sometimes, people get caught up in negative emotions, negative expectations and negative self-talk. They get so caught up in this negativity that they start to lose all their hope and optimism about life. These people may have some reason for their negative thoughts and feelings: some of them suffered through childhood losses […]
I hear a lot of complaints from men these days about how there are no nice women around. According to the men I’m talking to, they’re all nasty, selfish, crazy, needy. Instead of bemoaning the fact that the women they date are no good, these men really need to take some responsibility for the kinds […]
What is your “best self?” It’s a bit of an abstract concept, to be sure. In my opinion, your best self is the self you’d be if there had been nothing to interfere with your normal development into a fully functioning adult. Unfortunately, even for the most beloved and well cared-for child, life has a […]
We live in a society that favors extremes. In terms of how we relate to one-another, we’re often either too nice or too nasty. People often are trying too hard to please or are self-centered and insensitive toward others. Interestingly, these ways of being are just two sides of the same coin: they both arise […]
