There are a few basic errors we all tend to make in our relationships. These errors can cause us unnecessary unhappiness and even jeopardize the relationship we’re in. Here are a few basic relationship errors and how to avoid them: Relationship error #1- Erroneous expectations based on things that happened to us in the past. […]
We make a lot of bad choices in our lives. Sometimes, we make these choices because we don’t care to do better. This type of person isn’t going to do any better, precisely because they don’t care. The rest of us who make choices that are counter-productive or even destructive are doing so because of […]
When a person lives through hurtful experiences, whether they’re childhood trauma, war, natural disasters or forced displacement, they can lose the spark that makes life feel worth living. Too much hurt, too many negative experiences can cause a person to shut down emotionally, so much so that they feel dulled inside. This inner dullness is […]
I find that sometimes, people get caught up in negative emotions, negative expectations and negative self-talk. They get so caught up in this negativity that they start to lose all their hope and optimism about life. These people may have some reason for their negative thoughts and feelings: some of them suffered through childhood losses […]
I hear a lot of complaints from men these days about how there are no nice women around. According to the men I’m talking to, they’re all nasty, selfish, crazy, needy. Instead of bemoaning the fact that the women they date are no good, these men really need to take some responsibility for the kinds […]
What is your “best self?” It’s a bit of an abstract concept, to be sure. In my opinion, your best self is the self you’d be if there had been nothing to interfere with your normal development into a fully functioning adult. Unfortunately, even for the most beloved and well cared-for child, life has a […]
We live in a society that favors extremes. In terms of how we relate to one-another, we’re often either too nice or too nasty. People often are trying too hard to please or are self-centered and insensitive toward others. Interestingly, these ways of being are just two sides of the same coin: they both arise […]
The problem with all the diet plans available today is that they simply don’t work. Yes, some of them will enable you to lose weight temporarily, but if you’ve ever gone on a diet you know that sooner or later – and usually sooner- you’ll gain all the weight back, plus a few extra pounds. […]
I’ve been talking to some of my patients lately about their adventures in on-line dating, and they’ve been complaining about two different but related phenomena: men who come across as insufficiently interested right at the beginning and men who seem far too interested from the get go. One of my patients, Shelly, told me a […]
I was talking to my patient, Natalie, the other day about her struggles with overcoming compulsive eating. She told me that after years of becoming increasingly heavy, she was afraid that she’d “never be able to stop eating.” We spoke about how powerfully she felt the pull of food, and that it was almost as […]
